I'VE HAD ENOUGH !...

Model Railroader General Discussion (Model Railroader)
1

Some of you may recall me talking about a friend of mine a while back that can’t build his own layouts, can’t work on his own locos, can’t repair broken rolling stock or anything else. Well, yesterday afternoon my patients finally wore out after two years of having to do everything for him, I handed him the screw driver and told him it was high time that he started doing the work for himself if he wanted to call himself a model railroader… His response was throwing the screw driver down on the floor as hard as he could and yelling "just f*** it then!, I’ll take my s*** to the train shop in the city and have them work on it from now on. I then said, and what are you going to do when you need a building kit built, or something goes wrong with your tracks, or when your tracks need to be cleaned ?.. He then went on to try and blame me for his being in the hobby in the first place, and that I knew he wasn’t mechanically inclined, a carpenter, a model builder or anything else. Because of him, I haven’t had much time to spend on my own layout or to work on my own locos and rolling stock… He also has a “VERY” vulgar mouth, and talks about women in a filthy way constantly. I literally have gotten to the point that I hate being around the guy. I normally don’t associate with people like him, but because we shared a common interest, I overlooked his ways and so forth as long as I could stand it.
I’m not really asking anyone’s opinion or advice in this matter, but rather am just blowing off steam and sharing what happened. As for those of you that feel sorry for this guy and feel that I’m the bad guy, I’ll e-mail you his name and address and you can go babysit him for a while and let’s see how long your patients holds up with him.

After reading the replies so far, I felt I should come back and add a few things that I left out of my original posting so that those that see this for the first time will have a better idea of what this guy I’m talking about is like.

He’s 38 years old, single,

2

Good for you, I don’t think I could have held my tongue as long as you did.

3

well he sounds like a baby with a temper. and needs some soap for his mouth…
he shouldent have trains if can’t take care of them himself!

BEN

4

Good for you.

5

You did the right thing. If he doesn’t see the error of his ways and come to you and apologize, I’d find a new friend and forget about it.

6

With friends like him, who needs enemies? Seems like quite a leech - sucking all of your hobby lifeblood out of you. Good riddance!

Bob Boudreau

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you sure it was only the screwdriver he threw on the floor sounds like he chucked his toys out the pram as well
you are a more patient man than me

8

Think you did the right thing, blaming you for getting him into the hobby is a bit much! If he comes crawling back do it on your terms!

Get into your own layout and free yourself!

9

You aren’t the one at fault. Intercourse the idiot and work on your own layout. After all that is what a hobby is for, SELF relaxation and enjoyment.

You did the right thing, bravo!

10

You definitely did the right thing by walking out. I would never have tolerated his attitude as long as you did. You’re lucky he didn’t throw the screwdriver at you or hit you over the head with it. If he can’t learn, he needs to find something more suitable to do in his spare time.

11

Good to be free
I do not understnad how its your fault he was into model trains, you take him by gunpoint to the LHS and make him buy train stuff? He needs one of those custom layout builders to set him up.

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Tracklayer,
I hear what your talking about, I have a so called buddy who acts the same way most of the time, brings everything over to my home and expects me to fix it at the drop of a hat! He’s a nice guy most of the time, but cannot even change a simple coupler out or wire up a power pack with out me holding his hand. He has been in the hobby just as long as I have too. I built his bench work, work on his loco’s and cars, build his building kits and wire up everything. And the worst part is he wants it perfect and expensive.

Its embarrissing when him and I go to the LHS or train shows, he stands there and brags about all his loco’s, how much money he has spent, and all the work he has done. He buys the Broadway LTD engines and $30 freight car kits and has never once assembled a freight car on his own. I always end up putting them together free of charge. I built his bench work about 5 years ago and got it all ready to lay track which I ended doing with him leaning over me like a hawk chewing me out because he wanted something changed. He has never even touched any of the scenery at all either, its the same as it was after I put the track down and wired it up for him.

Christmas day was fun for me for awhile, wife got me a new dremel tool kit and bought me about 50 pounds of older loco parts and stuff for Athearn, MDC, and Rivarossi. I was sorting these items out when my buddy came over and brought a box with him with freight car kits and building kits he got for Christmas. I was instructed to get to work right away on all his items by him! No merry Christmas or anything from him! Well to make a long story short, I blew a gasket then! I grabbed him by the shirt after I was done telling him about him being so lazy about MR and dragged him to the door, and told him to go away! He always calls all my stuff JUNK, and bad mouths my layout and everything I own as far as MR. I told him as he walked to his car that being a MR means being able to do some things for your self, and he is no M

13

Life is too short, and model railroading time too scarce, to be spent in the presence of jerks.

Kudos to both of you for tossing the buggers out. [:)]

Mike Tennent

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I don’t want to even suggest that tossing babies into bathwater to see if they sink or swim is a bad idea. (How’s that for mixing metaphors?)

However, I do want to make folks here aware of “The Blackest Day of the Year”, which is approaching quickly.

For a great many people, the first paycheck in January is a pretty black day, because it’s already spent, but the glow of the holidays is still around so things aren’t too bad. The second paycheck in January is a whole order of magnitude blacker. Not only is it already spent too, but now the recipient has been living without adequate funds for a couple of weeks, leading to what I call the “January 14th” syndrome.

Many companies pay on the 1st and the 15th, many others pay weekly, so the day before the second Friday in January usually finds patience and tempers all across the spectrum at low ebb. Not only is the average guy dead broke, wondering how it made it till the day before payday with the 1st check in January spent up as of December 24th, in addition he also knows this next check is gone before he gets it too.

“No money in my pocket, and none coming anytime soon”.

Now, start multiplying the effect. When one person in this situation comes into contact with another person in this situation, things get ugly fast. Then both move onto other confrontations, carrying the hangover effect from the first, and the seeds of utter madness spread, like ripples in a pond. On meeting other ripple systems, they mingle and phase multiply until the entire population is like a pack of slavering wolverines, consumed in the frustration of unrequited greed, feeding off of each other’s negative energy and creating an all consuming black hole vortex of anger and animosity.

Personally, I just stock up on groceries and stay holed up in my remote home, avoiding everyone as much as possible. Any discussions of a sensitive nature, or even a possibly sensitive nature are posponed until at least the third week in Ja

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With these stories, I’m reminded of that great philospher Popeye…

“I’ve had alls I can stands, I can’t stands no more.”

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The line between being a friend and being used can get blurred. When you finally realize the line is crossed there is nothing to do but cut off all the help. If you’re still friends good, otherwise he’ll go leech off someone else.

BTW I don’t buy the idea that some people are total klutzes incapable of learning basic modeling skills (or anything else). You may not become a virtuoso, but you can certainly learn how to build benchwork, lay track, build a car kit, etc. It’s not talent, but a willingness to learn and practice that’s needed.

Enjoy
Paul

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Sorry,my hands arn’t big enough to fit around his throat if thats what you are asking.
Allan.

18

i’m amazed that you can treat these poor souls so harshly , they’re just trying to enjoy the hobby like we are but they haven’t got the skills to do it themselves

ahh ok i can’t keep a straight face … i’d have kicked the leeches to the curb a long time ago , good for you

19

I feel sorry for this guy I really do…You see he did not have the ambition to learn on his own and took advantage of your kindness.[V] That’s not a real friend…That’s a user of people in order to get a free ride.
I will help anybody as long as they show a desire to learn but,will not maintain their equipment.[:D]

20

I don’t see him being treated harshly…if he can’t do it, then he should get out of the hobby altogether if he’s that frustrated and not able enough to work on his equipment…I always took an interest in Bows and Arrows but found that I couldn’t shoot an arrow straight if my life depended on it …so guess what?..i put that hobby to the side…if the guy has to get others to do everything for him he should realize that it may be time to pursue something else he can adapt too…i don’t mind helping others but when they aren’t willing to help themselves or try to learn by doing what has just been taught to them then I know it’s a lost cause and will give up on them…maybe it’s better to stay away from this guy if he’s causing you this much problem…also, to tell you the truth I don’t like being around foul mouthed people either…there are over 500,000 words in the English language… a lot to choose from besides using only the four lettered kind…chuck