I have a slight dilemma created by my mother-in-law, and was hoping for some sage advice from this forum. [:)] First let me say that this isn’t a question of N vs. HO, but rather a question about hurting my mother-in-law’s feelings. (I can hear the disparaging mother-in-law jokes from the peanut gallery, but she really is a great person and I’m lucky to have a mother-in-law like her.)
For the past couple of months, I’ve been trying to design a layout to fit within a 6’x9’ area in a portion of a small storage room in the basement. We’ve been purging unnecessary stuff and getting creative at finding places to store other things to clear out some room. While I have a small amount of HO track and cars from when I was a kid, I decided to go with N scale based on a query to this forum. I haven’t purchased a thing yet, but N scale has been my whole world lately.
Last weekend was my birthday, and my mother-in-law gave me a bunch of old HO rolling stock and 5-6 diesel engines, as well as a few buildings and a small handful of track pieces she acquired through a co-worker up in Michigan. I don’t know how much she paid, but she felt she got a good deal. She is thrilled she found something other than a Home Depot gift card to get me for a change. Everything is in fair to good condition. The cars have knuckle couplers, but plastic wheels. There’s a DC controller, which I haven’t tested. Some couplers and trucks are broken, but they can be repaired.
My dilemma is that I still want to go with N scale, but don’t want to make my mother-in-law feel put out. I mentioned the dilemma to my wife, and when I said I was still leaning toward N scale, she replied, “Great, now we have more stuff to store.” Translation: you just got all this great train stuff from my mother and you’re not going to use it!? She did offer up a land grant of part of the main room of the basement. (It’s a completely finished, walk-out basement, which doesn’t at all feel like a traditional basement.) No ter
Depending on how much it is, build a display shelf and proudly show off how much your mother-in-law cares for you. Maybe even a plaque saying donated by…
your wife has expressed dissapointment that you’d consider not using the equipment her mother gave you , and has given you the green light to use more space than originally negotiated . i think it’s time for you to design an HO trackplan [:)]
ehowe , I have and Idea . I don’t know if it will help your situation but I will
throw it out there. It’s just and idea you don’t have to do it… Why Don’t you
build a small ho layout just for christmas time with the ho-equipment your
mother in -law purchase … Just and idea…Tim
i’d just stick with the HO scale…when you get old and feeble and your eyesight starts to go you’ll be glad you’re in HO scale…If i were into N at my age I wouldn’t be able to work with stuff that small…but if you are determined to go to N scale than honesty is the best policy…let your M-I-L know how much you appreciate what she’s done for you and for her interest in your interests, but that you’ve chosen to do N scale and that HO scale is out of the question from now on…Sell the HO stuff on E-bay and use the money to get some N scale stuff going…I don’t think you’ll hurt her feelings in the least and it will also clear the air, and she will then know that the next time she purchases you some “train” stuff it must be N scale …chuck
Join an HO club and build an HO module or two in the garage. Then build your N-scale empire in the basement. When the club goes to a show, take lots of pictures of “her” engines and rolling stock in a grand display setting.
I agree with cwclark, clear the air, NOW! Smooth the feathers and relate how much you appreciate the thought, but add what your goals are, and how much more help toward those goals would be appreciated. Then sell,barter,or ebay the items for n scale stuff, then be certain to let her know exactly what you got toward your goals with the proceeds from her gift.
I went through this years ago with my ex’s mom, and my own mother. Both were loading me up on train “trinkets”, china plates, and other stuff , train related but unusable on my layout.
Now my Mom gets me gift certs for my LHS at holidays, and is delighted when I stop by and show her what “She” got me!
Funny thing, my fiance’s mom got me a Visa gift card for last Christmas…smart lady!!![:D]
My mother in law bought me 12 1:64 scale John Deere tractors for my birthday this past year. She somehow overheard me talking about adding a John Deere tractor dealer on the layout and decided to stock me up with tractors. I didn’t have the heart to tell her they were way to big so guess what? I used them and they are proudly displayed on my layout, inside a showroom and in a field doing some plowing. Sometimes its better to just not say anything because you will hurt her feelings and your wifes feelings at the same time. Hey at least she was thinking of you and not telling her friends how much of a moron or how big of any idiot the guy her daughter married is, lol.
I like the idea of a shelf display layout myself. My mother had kept all of the equipment I had as a kid (I’m 37 now), and in January of this year, I went and got it all back and started working on my new layout. Well, as it turns out, out of the dozen or so locos and rolling stock I had, I only am using 1, my N&W GP9. But, the old stuff I have sure does bring back memories. It would cost too much to fix/update, so my wife suggested building a shelf display to display it in my train room.
You are indeed a lucky guy. As pointed out above, the fact that your mother in law is supporting your hobby vice the stereotypical mother-in-law thing is great! I’ll agree with several of the folks above and suggest some sort of display piece, diorama or something similar. Position it so it has a “place of honor” and make sure you point out to all visitors where the stuff came from. Once you start your layout and show her she’ll see that what she got you this time wasn’t the right “size” and hopefully she’ll make future purchases accordingly. She’ll also realize the lengths you went to to not hurt her feelings.
Dave,
Been there done that. Who cares if there are a few out of scale elements on the layout? The fact that it stands out gives you the chance to brag to visitors (hopefully in the presence of your wife) what a great m-i-l you have.
I was in the same boat. I’m an HO guy…at one point my wife and her mother stopped at the local hobby town and bought some trains. Most of it was N scale.
I created a mini layout with it. I definitely a multi scale household. If you keep the stuff around in some way I think everyone stays happy.
It’s your hobby, and as much as your mother in law meant well, she hasn’t done you much good. This is a statement of fact, not meant to seem hard-headed or hard-hearted.
If your space requirements in a pre-planned N-scale layout were smaller, you wife will very likely be happier in the long run. She offered more for HO, but only because of the facts as she understands them. Her mother’s contribution, and its use, is more important to her than is your hobby. So, the salient issues for HER are to keep her mother part of the system happily, and to provide you with the the minimum space you need if needs must.
So, I agree with getting it on the table…so to speak. Explain to your well-meaning (and thoughtful) MIL that, while you deeply appreciate her desire to assist you with your hobby, there are two scales that you are now faced with instead of only the one. In fact, you could take her down to the space, and begin to describe how scales work, and that you had visions of a perfectly doable N-scale layout mapped out in your head, If she is at all switched on, SHE"LL quickly realize that she has presented you with a dilemma, and will hopefully insist on relieving you of her gift. She may even find a way to convert it to N-sclae stuff…which will bring on a whole nuther set of problems if she gets NYC items when you model BNSF.
Nope, if this is important to you, stake out your territory…in the figurative and literal senses.
Build a HO Timesaver. All you really need is a 1"x12’ x6" board. It’s a puzzle game that people who are not model railroaders can have fun with. Maybe even your mother in law. As far as track work, wiring ground cover or maybe some modest scenery go consider it a small inexpensive practice project while you gather your N scale equipment and supplies. When not in use stand your Timesaver up in a corner or closet. Hardly takes any room at all. Have fun, make someone else happy, make use of the things you have and build the layout in the scale you want. Have some cake and eat too. Bruce