Off topic (maybe not?) Introverts

Trains Magazine General Discussion
1

Stick with me for a moment. There’s a 57% chance you’ll see the relevence.

I’m reading a book Introvert Power by Laurie Helgoe, PhD. The mor I read, the more this forum comes into focus.

She suggests, that the internet is the perfect medium for (us) introverts. See if any of this sounds familiar:

We can read and write rather than talk.

We can more comfortably network with people who share our interests and ideas.

We can take the time to think about something, before having to reply.

We can determine our own comfort zone, and come and go as we please.

We are not afraid to simply observe.

We like to read. We like things that take us away to somewhere else,
like romance novels, science fiction, trains, WW I battleships. (<OK just me.)

We like our get-away time, to peruse something away from the hustle & bustle.
Trains, for example.

We can find ourselves deeply involved in things others may find trivial.
(See any thread about tractive effort, for example.)

We’re known to have a dry/odd/weird sense of humor. Maybe we ponder too much.

We make up 57% of the population of North America.

Can anybody relate to this?

2

I dunno. I feel I am more extroverted and would be out working or actually riding trains if time and money permitted…and doing it with friends, not by myself. And I feel that the internet broadens by base of access to information and communicating with people from different places and not just inthe neighborhood. That being said, I see where she is coming from and she may be pretty much on target.

Years ago a friend explained the difference between modelers and other railfans in about the same terminoligy. Modelers, he explained, shunned society, weren’t social too much, were more introverted into thier own train rooms, less athletic and cometitive than those of us who grouped together in the outdoors to chase trains and take pictures and socialize in groups at meetings, etc.

3

I have friends that basically spend all their time on a computer. I don’t know if that makes them introverts or not. I proudly am not. Even when I am online, I am out because I have to go to a library and get a computer. But I don’t always mind, it is how I relax during or at the end of the day.

4

I would peg myself around 70% introverted. While I don’t mind large groups or crowds, I do enjoy spending time by myself and with a few close friends. Many of my hobbies are introverted (photography, railfanning, and model railroading) although I would not call myself a social recluse and do enjoy spending time with other people, although smaller groups are always preferred.

When railfanning, I’m always by myself, camera in hand, standing next to camcorder on tripod…

To your original observations on internet communications, I agree completely. I always prefer email over other forms of conversation, because I’m confident in my writing skills and feel that I can express myself well and have time to organize my thoughts. And yes, I do enjoy reading and getting away from it all for a while. Whenever I go somewhere and get back by day, within a few minutes I’ll be here, checking out the latest in railroading news and whetting my appetite for railroad-related material.

5

I believe you excell at all three.

6

Gee, you want me to autograph that biography? [8D]

7

Besides everything else said, you can stop listening (with your eyes) with just a mouse click!

Ed

8

I fake it well. I’m in sales, afterall! [;)]

9

[tup] [:I] [swg]

Hey Murphy - How’d you get that out of my personnel file ?!?

You keep reading stuff like that, we’ll have to throw you outta here !!!

Actually, you beat me to it - that’s a thread topic I’ve had in mind for a while. Except that I was going to frame it around the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (“MBTI”) or “personality type”, which is based on the following 4 scales and dichotomies (see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myers-Briggs_Type_Indicator ):

Extraversion <====> Introversion (E or/ vs. I)

Sensing <====> INtuition (S or/ vs. N)

Thinking <====> Feeling (T or/ vs. F)

Judging <====> Perceiving (J or/ vs. P)

My wife and her study group prefers to analyze such things with the “9 types” of the “Enneagram of Personality”. See: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Enneagram_of_Personality and htt

10

[(-D] Been there.&nb

11

I contributed to another forum (a recent start-up modeling forum) on the question, “Does your layout reflect your personality?”. This was my first reply:

“I don’t know that I can adequately answer the question. The most robust personality theory is called the “Trait Theory” and has been refined in recent years to what we call the “Big Five” traits (conscientiousness, agreeableness, extraversion, neuroticism, and openness). I guess an observer would point out parts of my layout that indicate a root in any one of these. I don’t know that conscientiousness applies to me greatly because I frotolance (not much fidelity there!). I don’t have to agree with a single person about my layout, except for She Who Must be Obeyed (what else is new.) I am an introvert mostly, and have to work at appearing to be extraverted. My introversion suits me nicely because I can be, as always, my own best friend (does that sound pathetic? I have never thought so…I am a very healthy and contented soul who can be alone for extended periods.). I would have to say that I am not at all neurotic. I have been a successful leader, soldier, teacher, husband, and father to three grown daughters. I really can’t think of a way that my neuroticism or lack of it could be reflected in my layout, unless the roundy-round style of my folded loop speaks volumes.”

When several responders seemed enthusiastic with that, I added the following to one of their observations that he had wondered if he was weird:

" I am happy to hear that both of you can relate.

Larry, I would say, from my numerous encounters with him here and on a couple other forums, would rank high on agreeableness. I don’t know that my critics on MR forums would apply that label to me, but I am pretty sure my success as a teacher and counsellor lends some currency for its application to me. My now grown daughters would probably

12

Well I’m 64 years old so I don’t have to worry about all that personality[swg] crap anymore. Don’t need a job, don’t want a job. Humbug to all of you [(-D]

John

13

Oh, yeah? Well…

14

This seems like a good point to note that one other personality aspect I intended to suggest adding to Murphy Siding’s list above is:

A preference for avoiding conflict - not necessarily debate, but hostile, angry conflict.

Also - I agree with selector’s comments about a personality as being relative to the specific context, enviroment, setting, or culture in which it is being observed or tested. We can’t all always be in the place we like and feel secure in - and when we’re in those other places, and are being pushed and stressed and neither the support nor the refuge is there - then sometimes we take action that is inconsistent with our preferences - which can be "acceptable"or “unacceptable”, depending on the circumstances.

Another thought just struck me (because it’s one of my wife’s ongoing crusades): Is there any correlation between introversion as we’re discussing it here, and autism or autistic tendencies (whatever that syndrome is called), which I understand is far more prevalent in males than females ? [:O]

[soapbox] Or, is it instead that we’re perfectly normal, and we just wish they’d go away and leave us alone ? After all, we’re guys (mostly), and accustomed to and genetically programmed* to work alone and quietly, etc. ?

  • From “In Defense of the Caveman” - that’s how our ancestors did the hunting thing with the big game to feed themselves and the clan - quiet to avoid spooking the quarry, independently so as to cover as much area as possible and to avoid having to coordinate by communication = noise, etc. Go see the show or read the book or blog or whatever to find out why the women are equally well programmed to stay in groups and talk among themselves a lot - it all makes sense.

Hey Murphy - that book was written by

15

In my business life I spend virtually all of my time either speaking with customers or associates on the phone or in person and spend great amounts of time at business functions like meals, conferences, etc…and so I personally like to have as much “quiet time” when I am “off duty” so to speak, as possible and really like such modern technology such as caller ID on the phone, etc. so if I don’t want to speak to somebody, I don’t have to. I don’t think this makes me an introvert but rather someone who cherishes his private time, either with immediate family or alone if appropriate. I like this forum communication method at times but also fully enjoy the company of fellow railfans when I am out and about engaged in our hobby.

16

There’s a quote to the effect of: “If you don’t like - or aren’t comfortable - being alone with yourself - then what does that say about you ?”

I may have mangled that quite a bit, but hopefuly you’ll get the idea.

  • PDN.
17

I usually prefer my own company. I work in a tower by myself, and, though I occasionally have students or visitors, I don’t say too much when they’re around. I definitely prefer to think about what I write/post; it will almost always be exactly what I wanted to say (and it will be spelled and punctuated correctly!).

I am devastatingly logical (just ask Pat!).

However, I do enjoy at least meeting others who frequent the Forum. I often say a lot less than Pat during these meetings–normal for me, no reflection on the other members. One of these meetings nearly proved to be my undoing…Pat wasn’t around, and I found myself in the unusual role of doing most of the talking. The results were not good. Fortunately, I’ve since learned more about myself, what’s “wrong” with me, what I should and should not do, whom I should avoid, and am satisfied to live within my own limitations.

Is retirement really going to change me that much? I hope not!

18

Bingo! One of my sons told me I was painfully logical. Did we all marry extroverts?[:)]

19

I wouldn’t be surprised…

20

I wonder what the percentage of people on here with Aspergers is? I’ve never been tested for it but both my doctor and therapist have thought I could have it.