As you may have seen my other posts, about me getting made fun of for model railroading and me quiting…
I’m going to model again as you may or may not know…I miss it too much. I’m going to a highschool next year that pretty much no one likes me (parents don’t have enough money to send me to the right school) Yes, I already know these kids. But, since they already don’t like me the insults will just be worse I’m thinking.
What should I say to them If they make fun of my modeling?
When I was in high school, I tried to hide my hobby, it just wasn’t cool. Still, folks found out and made comments. Don’t feel that you have to defend your interest, don’t even try to explain. Unless they are willing to start a fight over it, just walk away and don’t worry about it. You don’t need to impress them, you only need to be happy with what you’re doing. They will continue to “pick” on you only so long as they think it is bothering you. Once they figure you don’t care what they think, they’ll move on to someone else. If there are others who share your interest hang out with them. My best friend and I both loved trains, he was also very cool, I wasn’t. We played sports together and a bunch of other stuff, trains were just one of the things we had in common.
Now, I have no problem letting folks know I like trains. I’m in charge of 75 people and not one likes trains, at least as far as I know. Most are into cars, trucks, hunting fishing and such, I share some of those interests as well. They don’t frown on what I do and if they give me static, I drop them and make them do push ups! [:D]
Although I was not into trains during high school, I was pretty much a geek and into electronics and drafting, but I did like to sit near the tracks as a kid and watch the Florida East Coast roll by. I used to lay on my bed and read books on Frank Lloyd Wright so that shows you how socially inept I was LOL I bagged groceries all through high school, wore parachute p
Tell them you’re augmenting your education, so you can get into a good college.
When I was a kid, I learned as much from my trains as I did at school. It was a practical kind of knowledge, electrical wiring, structural engineering and the like. At the time, of course, I didn’t think of “taking engines apart and fixing them” as mechanical engineering, but that’s really what it is. Today, of course, a DCC-equipped layout is an introduction to practical uses of computers, bus addressing and hexidecimal arithmetic as well.
Because I was able to indulge my interest in science and engineering at a very practical level, in a self-directed and self-paced manner, I hardly realized how much I was learning. I was doing something right, because I ended up at MIT, one of the top schools in the world for those subjects.
I’m 60 years old now, and my trains are still teaching me new things.
I would say nothing. Kids can be cruel, and the more information you give them, the more fodder they have to give you more hassle. They want you to react.
When I was in high school, I didn’t do much modeling at all. I was very busy with school, band, and the track team, and so what little time I had left was spilt between trains and friends. Now, I had a core group of friends that knew I did model railroading, and they didn’t mind. Most kids at school didn’t know or care that I did. Honestly, kids will always find reasons to tease one another.
High school is tough because of the social pressures. But high school is a mere speedbump in life. You’ll get to college and find whole groups of people just like you. Moreover, they’ll be more mature and will have found other ways to feel better about themselves than to make others feel bad. Hang in there.
In the end, if someone’s teasing you, you don’t owe them some sort of complex explanation of why you’re a model railroader. Doing so only gives them more reason to keep after you. They’re not worth an explanation. Tell them that!
I feel your pain. I’ll be a Senior in High School next year. If anyone asks just ignore them, unless they seem like they are interested. Keep your grades up AND sleep in class. Nothing boggles there mind like someone with the best grades in class but whenver they’re in class they sleep. If someone does find out, tell them your having fun with what you do and its not hurting anyone.
Beat them over the head with a cast metal Big Boy while screaming “HOW DO YOU LIKE MY TRAINS NOW!!??? HUH? HUH?”. (just kidding.[:D])
I agree with JMartin. Most of those losers grow up to be…well…“losers”. If they grow up at all. You’ll get the last laugh. It just might take you 20 years. Do you really think Bill Gates was popular in high school? Imagine being the FIRST computer geek. Now he’s laughing all the way to the bank. Funny how things work out.
I am afraid it’s an age you will just have to go through. Regardless of your hobby, someone else is going to try to make themselves look bigger by making fun of you. Times have changed so much I do not feel I could offer any good advice, other than to suggest saying nothing.
There isn’t anything you can say that will change their minds. They are looking for a reaction. Don’t give it to them.
Get involved in some other activites and do well in school. Success is the best revenge.
Actually there are so many aspects of model railroading (history, mechanics, electrical, electronics, business, economics, geology, botany, management, et al) that it should help you in school.
I would agree with those that say “nothing”. I would also agree with the gentleman who says that this is just something you will have to deal with. If you honestly have people who don’t like you just because of your hobbies, there really isn’t anything you can do about it. That being said, don’t waste your energy on something you can’t change. Now, if you act like Napoleon Dynamite, your hobbies probably aren’t the reason people are giving you a hard time. Unfortunately, people your age don’t typically have enough perspective to appreciate the things that are really important and they tend to focus on the superficial aspects of life. Also, as others have said, they are simply looking for a reaction from you, so don’t give them the satisfaction they are after.
Contrary to what the more sensitive people these days will tell you, you are not a victim and adolescent taunting will not haunt you for the rest of your life unless you -choose- to let it. Do what makes you happy, the rest will come naturally.
Good for you. Your decision to return to an activity which you enjoy regardless of what your peers might think, shows me a level of maturity which they have yet to attain. Don’t try to impress anyone, just be yourself and enjoy life. There are probably a lot more like you in your school than you think. Keep your eye out for them, and ignore the others. Best wishes.
buy a copy of ‘Soldier of Fortune’ magazine , remove the cover and wrap it around your copy of ‘Model Railroader’
the other kids will still ignore you , but nobody will make fun of you
ok i know , this is in bad taste . i’m just kidding really . ignore them . find the one or two other people in your school who like trains , they’ve got to be there !
My advice: Endure it quietly. These kids are trying to break you. Fighting them only makes it worse. Develop a dry sense of humor that will allow you to laugh off these losers. Knocking you down makes them feel superior, and there’s nothing you can do that will stop it.
But remember the most important bit: It’s only temporary. It’s only 4 more years for you, and if you live to be 80, what’s 4 years? 5% of your total life span. Don’t let a lousy 5% of your life ruin the remaining 75% or more (if you’re lucky). When I was the target of these kinds of “people” (and I use that term loosely), I think the most depressing thing was the thought that it would never get better, that I would forever be the target. And heck, how was I to know any better? Nobody told me that things could change. Growing up, it was all I knew from my “social peers” (again, very loosely used term), and that mental abuse was just the way it was.
Thank god for college. It allowed me to start fresh. And it took a while to shake off my mentally abused past at the hands of my “peers”, but I eventually was part of a large social circle in college that I only could dream about in high school.
IMHO, a big reason why a lot of kids snap in grade school is that no one tells them that it’s only temporary…that things can change after graduation and so much for the better. Move away to a new town, or go to a distant or unusual college where you can get away from these idiots, and a new life begins at 18.
The school environment these days is so artificial and fake compared to the grand scope of the rest of your life. Most kids are a bunch of fools for living only in the microcosm of their school life. Enduring the ridicule quietly is the best advice, I believe. I was a major uncoordinated nerd in school, but I focused on my studies and got good grades … and that made a big difference later, even though the other kids hated me for it because it made them look bad.
Because of my good grades I got a college scholarship and had much of my college education paid for.
Also, once I got out of school and into the “world”, I was able to start fresh with establishing my image and I found out that adults for the most part treat you much better than kids in school.
One bright side to my interest in model trains turned out to be the janitor at my high school – he was a model railroader. Through his son, he found out I was interested in model trains and we became fast buds. It was the first time I had an adult treat me as an equal and it was powerfully liberating.
That day will come for you too … you will find adults who will accept you as an equal and those days of schoolkid nonsense will eventually fade. The last thing you want to do is return in kind or harbor hate or you’ll become like them – or worse. Forgive them for their foolish shortsightedness – just mentally go around them and set your sites on the rest of your life.
That’s what I did and now in my 50s and looking back am I ever so glad that’s what I did. It wasn’t easy and the ridicule hurt, but I didn’t let it crush me. I had better things to do with my life and didn’t want to waste energy on seeking revenge or wallowing in self-pity.
Around here no one cared. I don’t know what it is but so far no one has found out. Besides my friends. I was an active modeler but never said any thing about school. Now a week ago We had a Band “sectional”(more like a fun day because no one showed up) and my band teacher (who also likes trains) was talking about it. Now the 3 kids that where there said what you doing? And my band teacher siad where looking at trains. And one of the kisd said, Your into that? and my band teacher was like yeah. And the kid who asked said nothing and totally engored it. He never siad any thing.
It the kids at your school are picking on you, and it’s really starting to bug you, then tell a teacher. They will help. And if all else fails, make it look like you don’t like trains any more. Be active in the hobby, but don’t show it. And if the kids bug you more say, I don’t like trains any more. Those things are lame. But still be a active modlar.
I have a few thoughts to consider, Milwaukee Road.
It is important that you feel good about who you are and what you do.
It is not important at all what others think of you and say about you.
It’s good to have some trusted friends to share your feelings with them. This forum as you correctly indicated are your friends. I hope there are some people in your life who you can also share feelings in person.
Peer pressure can be highly dangerous in some cases. Sadly, you may see some of your own school mates making very bad choices because of that peer pressure. Looks like you are not the type to follow such paths.
Establish positive goals for yourself and make plans to accomplish them. Then follow through with those plans.
You will be amazed sometime in about 50 to 60 years how quickly the years went by. You will feel good when you realize that you used your time and resources wisely.
I don’t want to be another skateboarder who wears girl pants (thats called “emo” for the older folks out there) Or another kid who wears Milwaukee Brewers shirts 24/7.
I know I’ll find my group eventually. Don’t get me wrong, I have LOTS of friends right now, just not any that like the railroad.
Once again, thank you. [bow]
PS* Hopefully in a month or two you will be seeing pictures of my Milwaukee Road layout.
“Reputation is what other people think they know about you. Honor is what you know about yourself.” (Aral Vorkosigan, A Civil Campaign, by Lois McMaster Bujold)
What is dishonorable about learning things that other people don’t know - everything from obscure items of history (as you learn about railroads in general and your favorite prototype in particular) to entry level engineering (civil, mechanical and electrical)? What is dishonorable about making good use of your time while others waste it in pursuits that may damage anything from their academic achievement to their arrest records? What is dishonorable in spending your limited financial resources on something which will yield a tangible remainder long after the last butt has been smoked, the last Budweiser can has been recycled and all those outdated hit music CDs have been consigned to the trash can?
Do you really need a reputation as just another present dumb(donkey) and future loser? Or would you rather have a reputation as someone who intends to make good use of time now and should be an achiever in the real world beyond high school? Believe me, your teachers know the difference - and it is THEIR respect (and that of your parents) which is important to you.
So, what do you say when the mundanes show how small-minded they are? Just ask them what they expect to do with the rest of their lives! Pretty soon you, and they, will encounter the real world - an encounter for which you will certainly be better prepared than they will be.
“Remember those guys that used to collect on the street corner? They’re still there. Saw them as I drove past in my (fill in obscenely expensive luxury car of choice.)” Robert L. Murphy, professional photographer.