My wife supports my model railroad hobby. She likes to give me train gifts for Birthday and Christmas. In the past I have supplied her with a list and she buys something off of the list. While this is very much appreciated, I wish that she could just get things and surprise me. I have tried to educate her about my scale and modeling era, but things just don’t click with her. She was dissapointed because my birthady just passed and she was not able to get me any train stuff. My most treasured gift is an old Athearn BB Box car that she gave me as a gift many years ago without any assistance from me.
I guess that it would be nice if someone wrote a book, “Wife’s/Girl friend’s Guide to Trains”.
My wife knows I model the Southeast in the 50’s (“nothing after 1956”), and I taught her to read Built Dates, so she can choose anything in the right scale that fits. Sometimes it is a structure; having lived in the South, she knows what fits and what doesn’t, sometimes it’s a freight car, and so on.
Maybe if you give her wide parameters, she can find something that fits within them.
Most – yes most – of my structure kits have been gifts from my wife. She’s also bought locomotives and other stuff. Now if I can find the time to get the stuff built. I guess that is a good problem to have. [:)]
The fact that she loves you even though you “play with trains” is sufficient. Her “off” gifts may be due to her desire to surprise you. My only suggestion to “steer” her is to talk about the kinds of models you like. Most importantly, never criticize her gifts.
It’s never easy for most of them - bless their hearts.
I usualy get toiletries from her indoors which I appreciate and definately use during the year.
This year, I’m angleing for a decent size quantity of scale palms - good ones aint cheap - and unlike her, I have a bit of a cash flow problem to the extent that these are really way outside of any budget I may have reluctanly imposed upon myself. Anyway, I have left an order form and ficticious notes reminding myself to buy these and being a woman who picks up on such things it maybe some palms that Santa will stick in a sack for me this Christmas.
My 2rd wife was a NS Engineer, my 3rd wife was a welder for CSX. My 4th wife was a NS brakeman (brakewomen). It helps to pick the best apples from the tree. That way they have railroading in their blood. [sigh]
SImple answer to the whole thing - gift certificate to the LHS. That way, she doesn’t have to worry about perhaps buying the wrong thing, which no matter what she’ll KNOW is wrong when you open it.
Yes, it is always nice to get something without having to ask, but given the alternative of getting something that you REALLY don’t want or like… I’d stick with the letter to Santa routine.
If you have a local hobby shop, sometimes they have a “registry book” for birthdays & Christmas. That would be helpful as well. And, the owner or one of the regular hands might be able to steer her in the right direction if she asks.
Using either of those options will pretty much insure that you won’t have to pull an Amtrak Superliner behind your prized model of the Jupiter. : )
I wish that I had a LHS. We used to have one in Topeka KS (30 miles from where we live) and the owner could have filled her shopping cart with lots of things that would be appropriate for my era and layout. The shop is now closed.
Last year I suggested that she call a large on-line retailer that I have purchased a lot of items from over the past few years. They have an 800 number so I suggested she call them with the list and they could make suggestions. I have always been impressed with their customer service. They were not very nice or helpful to her. They apprently did not want to waste time with a newbie. (Too bad for them because she would have bought their most expensive brass locomotive if they could have convinced her that is what I needed for my layout.) Guess I won’t be making any more buys from that shop!!!
We are going to Denver for the holidays to visit family, and I told her that we could stop by Caboose Hobbies. She said OK but I needed to let her get me something for Christmas.
Again, my issue is not to get the best gift, and anything she purchased would be appreciated. She wants to get things that I will use on the layout. (Want to know why I know so much about American Girl Dolls?)
It helps to have a LHS with a staff or owner who is willing to make suggestions based on your preferences. I have a lot of issues from time to time with my LHS, but the thing they do well is that they remember who I am, what my model preferences are, the era, etc., and offer excellent assistance to my wife and kids when they come in to shop for me. Sometimes, the “hard sell” can be overkill, and that has irritated my wife as well as me.
Early on in our marriage, I would circle items in the Walthers Catalog. She simply picked out a circled item and made a phone call.
She suprised me recently when she asked me why “your F units don’t have train numbers in the indicators”. I about fell out of my chair. She knows more than she lets on, and my Model Railroaders frequently find their way around the house without any assistance from me. I’ve even caught her a time or two putting small structure kits together.
My wife is very supportive. We’re broke, but supportive. She knows the era that I am modeling and is not afraid to ask for help at the LHS. We’ve been to enough shows, markets, and stores so she has a very good idea what I want / need. Just keep her involved. She probably knows more than she is letting on!
Well, that’s the other option - a list of a dozen or more things you’d want, and let her pick. At least that way she can’t complain you know exacly what you’re getting. The bigger the list, the better. I used to do this with books, too - I’m pretty picky - so I’d make alist of a couple dozen books and could usually expect my present to include a couple of them - always from my list, so definitely something I wanted to read.
I’m not wishing you any bad tidings, but if for any reason # 4 doesn’t work out, I would hope that you’ll consider fishing in a different lake for compainionship.
This looks like a marketing opportunity for hobby dealers. Some online clothing retailers (and others) offer a “wish list.” Customers can put stuff on their wish list and then refer their prospective gift givers to that list (like a wedding registry). LHSs could do the same thing, manually.
