I don’t feel a compelling need to be “validated” by my family and friends for my interests, hobbies, and actions, as long as they are not harmful to others. Nor do I choose the confrontational or the defensive position. I like what I like.
There is nothing to be gained arguing the point, so I choose the high road…with a huge smile on my face.
Yes, I admit I do get a pleasurable kick out of the consternation from some over my passion for toy trains. The trains have been in my heart pushing 6 decades and will remain there. They see I am well-grounded in my past with the trains, in a good way. That is all I need to know.
I have gone through these types of “discussions” over the decades regarding my choice and color of automobiles, raising kids (and now helping with the grandkids), marital choices, business decisions, health decisions, educational decisions, and the list goes on. When the smoke clears, I am still standing and moving forward, comfortable within myself and having offended no one in the process by getting into a chidish exchange where no one wins.
Would you rather win? Or would you rather be right? There is quite the difference between the two.
hi guys i am so glad i can vent my problem with you guys it was great comment that really cheered me up on this holiday. Let me tell you this also my father and mother and brothers i grew up with trains live across America from me, when i say family that think this way about trains i meant my wife’s family but is the closes family i have during these holidays and they are very strange when it comes to trains. i will never stop loving my trains I just will not share the joy of trains with the hatters of this great hobby.
You could compare trains with golf or skiing or some other “approved” hobby. Now about golf, I have two nephews that are professional grade golfers. If they shoot a round of 72, it is a bad day. The regularly shoot below par. This is one of the reasons I don’t play golf. I have no talent for the game, and could never get good at it no matter what. So why bother. I enjoy trains, hot rods, engineering, and a few other things. Hot rods have been an issue with people around me for 55 years because of the “dirty T shirt” appearance. Working on cars is usually somewhat messy, so people object. However, when their cars breakdown, who do they call?
Golf costs more than trains, and there is very little ROI. Trains, on the other hand, teach people valuable skills. When I was a kid, I learned a lot about mechanical things and electricity from the trains. This interest in trains became a degree in electrical engineering which I have found to be very useful.
Servoguy, I am both a model train guy and a golfer.
I know exactly what you mean about your nephews.
Sounds like that son-in-law of mine who does not understand my love of trains.
He is a 3-handicap and I am a 24-handicap.
I am like you, yet I play golf in spite of those two reasons. I have no talent for the game, and could never get good at it no matter what. So why do I bother? LOL
The love for trains is either a 1 or a 0. You cannot explain your love of trains to someone who is a 0. And you don’t need to explain your love of trains to someone who is a 1.
“No other product of man’s mind has ever exercised such a compelling hold upon the public’s imagination as the steam locomotive. No other machine in its day has been a more faithful friend to mankind, nor has contributed more to the growth of industry in this, the land of its birth and indeed throughout the whole world. Those who have lived in the steam age of railways will carry the most nostalgic memories right to the end..” The words of R F Hanks, Chairman of the Western Area Board of British Railways at a ceremony in Swindon Works on 18th March 1960, marking the end of steam locomotive construction in the UK with the completion and naming of 9F 2-10-0 No 92220 “Evening Star”.
Steam engines ruled the rails for 150 years, from Richard Trevethick’s first loco until the Garratts stopped running in Africa. Can any other machines of the industrial revolution make that claim?
bigdogjeff - Now that you’ve named the source of your torment, rest assured…it’s not the trains they dislike…
In your example, I would reach out to those that would embrace your hobby—> the little kids. Find out what their interests are, and odds are, you can mate up the appropriate freight car to them. Then the tumblers will fall into place.
Huh? Wife/wifey’s family? What you are getting from them is called group abuse & victimization and I’m sure it is not limited just to toy trains. [:(!]
You don’t tell us if you are the main wage earner in the home. If you are, you can remind your loving family that you pay the house payment, utilities, taxes etc which makes their standard of living possible. Then inform them that if the trains bother them that much, they are free to live elsewhere. You will be glad to wave as they ride off into the sunset.
If you are a “little kid” then so are Rod Stewart, Neil Young, The Late Frank Sinatra and the late Tom Synder.All of them pursued toy or model trains in one form or another. All of those men were great success stories in the feild of entertainment. I suspect none of your critics have attained that level of success have they?
You should not try to live someone else’s life that they have laid out for you. If you do, you will wake up an old man wondering where it all went.
A friend and fellow model railroader often says to critics and friends, “I play trains.” I used to be shocked until I remembered that people play cards, board games, baseball, football (i.e., sports) computer games…well you get the idea. Now, whenever I run into someone who snears at my hobby, I smile at them, kindly ask them what they do for fun, and say, “I’m having FUN! What’s wrong with me having some innocent fun, just like you do?” Once in a while they will say, “I guess you’re right.” Sometimes they just walk away. Perhaps it takes a little bit of a thick skin to make lemonade (if you don’t mind me mixing my metafors.)
When our friends call on the phone, they ask where I’m at. " just out in the garage playing with his trains" my wife would say. But when they come over to visit, they always want to see what I’ve added to my model railroad train layout. That is how you keep my friends and critics interested in model railroading. Give them something new to watch, Action, Sound, with three train running at the same time in different directions on “My Classic American Flyer Cabinet-top Train Layout”
If you have taken care of all your obligations like a responsible adult should, what you do with the money and time you have leftover is your business.
I am 62 years old, and have had trains all my life. It started wwith my grandfather who was a real railroader, as was his father, and my mother’s uncle.
I remember one time when I was still in my teens, an uncle of mine saying something about me being to old to be playing with trains. I hurt me at the time, and truthfuly today don’t understand it as his sons too had their trains. In fact his first son, my cousin is still actively involved in model railraoding today, and he is older than I.
My mother supported me in the hobby when I was young. She said that when I was in the basement working on trains, she didn’t have to worry that I was out on the street getting into trouble.
My dad supported me by getting me materials to expand and better build my trains. He also had the sense to ask me what I wanted to do with the trains when I left to go to college. I am glad I kept them as they developed into a lifetime interest.
I do not have an operating layout at the time being, and most of my trains are in storage. However this week, my son set up some trains for Christmas which I have run each night as I come home from work. Most of my training now is that I always have trains on my workbench that i can tinker with, and my interest range from real trains to models. That brings me to my next point.
I work as an engineer for a large computer company. I and a number of other people I work with or have worked with attribute having our jobs today due to our having our trains when we were younger. We learned certain skills in working on them and expanded it into our careers.
At the same time those trains on my work bench, and my trains when I have had a layout have been good for me. They
I know a guy who collects thousands of dollars worth of basketball sneakers such as limited release Air Jordans, Air Pennys, Kobes and so forth. These things in the boxes took up an entire wall of the room that he was renting. When he lost his job and ran out of money to pay the rent, he asked me to store some stuff and help him move. He wouldn’t sell the shoes.
Basketball shoes are kind of a main stream hobby these days, but a lot of collectors seem to be in similar situations as my friend. There’s no way something like that is less crazy than collecting anything else. I’m not going to get in to the release camp outs and fights, but I will mention that these things happen. You can’t even wear the sneakers often if you want them to keep the value, because they will turn yellow.
At least the trains don’t just sit there like a bunch of shoe boxes, you can develop some skills, learn history, and using them won’t hurt the value too badly. Its easier to involve friends and family members in the hobby. Fewer people get stabbed over them.
I get exactly the type of grief that you’ve described, usually from a particular cousin. I get questioned whenever I get another train, when I bought my Mustang, or when I rescued a neglected 91 Probe GL from a small used lot. It was “Why do you need three cars?” and “Why do you need a second Probe?” just to cite a few.
I don’t know if you’ve had the offenders also ask how much you paid for whatever you bought? That really gets me. That cousin of mine asked how much I paid for the 91 GL and my answer was “$1280 off the lot and another $1K on top for the parts that it needed to get things rolling. Can you help me out, because I need more yet and the body is rotten?” That put an end to that discussion.
The two replies in this thread that really grabbed my attention were Becky’s and C.W. Burfle’s. Maybe these people are just jealous, or maybe we need to show them the door. That would get the point across.
In the end, do whatever you want to do. Buy as many trains as you want while I work on the most expensive first generation Probe around.[;)]