I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the
poison control center. Today, this woman called in very upset because
she caught her little daughter eating ants. I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital. She calmed down and at the end of the conversation happened to mention that she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the ants. I told her that she better bring her daughter into the emergency room right away.
Here’s your sign, lady. Wear it with pride.
Number Two Idiots of 2003
Early this year, some Boeing employees on the airfield decided to steal a life raft from one of the 747s. They were successful in getting it out of the plane and home. Shortly after they took it for a float on the river, they noticed a Coast Guard helicopter coming towards them. It turned out that the chopper was honing in on the emergency locator beacon that activated when the raft was inflated. They are no longer employed at Boeing. Here’s your sign, guys. Don’t get it wet; the paint might run.
Number Three Idiot of 2003
A true story out of San Francisco: A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America, walked into the branch and wrote “this iz a stikkup. Put all your muny in this bag.” While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he began to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might call the police before he reached the teller’s window. So
he left the Bank of America and crossed the street to Wells Fargo. After waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note to the Wells Fargo teller. She read it and, surmising from his spelling errors that he wasn’t the brightest light in the harbor, told him that she could
Jim, h—fire NO!! But it would be nice to know what his actual face looks like: never know
if we’ve seen him somewhere before.
After all, we’ve seen your picture and Mookie’s on the forum, plus a couple of other rail
fans. It might be wise to know what we all look like, just in case any of us are profiled
on AMERICA’S MOST WANTED!!!
How many ? 3 ?
Wrong, there are 6 !!–no joke.
Read it again.
The reasoning behind is further down.
The brain cannot process “OF”.
Incredible or what ? Go back and look again!!
Anyone who counts all 6 “F’s” on the first go is
a genius. Three is normal, four is quite rare.
Send this to your friends-it drives them crazy.
Now how many people got 3 but would not post it? Come on now, fess up. [:D]
[^]
Well I hope everyone got a kick out . . . oF . . . it anyway. [:D]
Some more Idiot stories . . . . . . .[:o)] [B)] [:0] [:p] [8D]
Number Five Idiot of 2003
A guy walked into a little corner store with a shotgun and demanded all of the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of Scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf. He told the cashier to put it in the bag as well, but the cashier refused and said, “Because I don’t believe you are over 21.” The robber said he was, but the clerk still refused to give it to him
because he didn’t believe him. At this point, the robber took his
driver’s license out of his wallet and gave it to the clerk. The clerk
looked it over and agreed that the man was in fact over 21 and he put
the Scotch in the bag. The robber then ran from the store with his loot. The cashier promptly called the police and gave the name and address of the robber that he got off the license. They arrested the robber two hours later.
This guy definitely needs a sign!
Idiot Number Six of 2003
A pair of Michigan robbers entered a record shop nervously waving
revolvers. The first one shouted, “Nobody move!” When his partner moved, the startled first bandit shot him.
This guy doesn’t need a sign, he probably figured it out himself.
A visitor from Holland was chatting with his American
friend and was jokingly explaining about the red,
white and blue in the Netherlands flag. “Our flag
symbolizes our taxes,” he said. “We get red when we
talk about them, white when we get our tax bill, and
blue after we pay them.”
“The same with us,” the American said, “only we see
stars, too.”